Sunday, December 25, 2011

Enjoy your Associated Holiday with a pun!

This holiday, I taught my brother how to focus.

That is, I gave him presents of mind!

(Rating: 2.5/5)

Friday, December 9, 2011

Farming Pun

Q: How did the man feel right before he was run over by a grain harvester?

A: He was under a lot of thresher.

(Rating: 3.5/5)

Wednesday, December 7, 2011

You'll have to be drunk to find this funny >_> (Alcohol Pun)

Q: What do you call a conference about fermented grain?

A: A meading

(Rating: 2/5)

Monday, December 5, 2011

Bad Electronics Pun :(

Q: Where do circuit boards come from?

A: Circuit-tree

(Rating: 1.5/5 D:)

Saturday, December 3, 2011

Hearing Pun

Q: What do you call a battle lost through loss of hearing?

A: A deaf-eat

(Rating: 2.5/5)

Thursday, December 1, 2011

Electronics Pun

Q: What do you call a new method for combining electronic files?

A: An e-merging technology!

(Rating: 3.5/5)

Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Ice Skating Pun

Why couldn't the ice skater make an on the ice?

He couldn't figure-eight out!

(Rating: 3/5)

Thursday, October 20, 2011

Color pun

What do you call it when you dream in color?

A pigment of your imagination!

(Credit goes Megan, whoever you are >.>)

(Rating: 3.5/5)

Wednesday, October 5, 2011

Cat pun

What do you you call a line of adorable kittens pictures?

Queued! (Get it, queued, cute?)

I'm just kitten around, though.

(Rating: 2/5, together, 3/5)

Pie Pun

As spoken by WeirdoOfDoom as they were consuming a pie mostly composed of nice looking chocolate cream.

Me: How is the pie?
Them: It's pretty filling.

(Rating: 3/5- works 3 ways but not excellently)

Monday, October 3, 2011

Angle Pun

Q :Why didn't the math student like using radians?

A: They were harder to some degree.

(Rating: 2.5/5)

Monday, February 14, 2011

Don't knock it (Door pun)

Q: What group asked the famous ding-dong-ditcher for his autograph?

A: A-door-ring fans.

(Rating: 3/5- Works both ways but convoluted)

Saturday, February 12, 2011

Blood puns

Since the gracious Pun Master is feeling generous, here's a triple post:

I was having a discussion about copious gore in media.

...saying all gore is harmful to the media would be mis-bleading.

...given the choice between no blood and too much, I'd choose the splatter.

I guess gore puns have been bled dry!

(Collective rating: 3/5- none are that good, but okay together.)

Thursday, February 10, 2011

Rain Pun

I was walking home when it began to rain. It turned out to be a pour choice.

(Rating: 2/5)

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

Card Game Pun

Q: How much trouble was the man in when his opponent was dealt four kings?

A: He was royally screwed.

(Rating: 2/5)

Sunday, February 6, 2011

Bulliten Board Pun

Q: Why did the man staple his advertisement to the bulletin board?

A: He didn't want it to look tacky.

(Rating: 3.5/5)

Friday, February 4, 2011

Clock Pun

Q: Was the man angered by the loud clock?

A: Yes, he was ticked off.

(Rating: 2/5- doesn't work both ways, too simple to be funny)

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Gross Double Pun

Q: Why did the lion roar incredibly loudly before killing and consuming his prey?

A: He wanted to make sure they were deaf-eated.

(Rating: 3.5/5- strange, but sorta works both ways)

Monday, January 31, 2011

Hearing Pun

Someone suggested that we hear by having lots of small hairs vibrate in our ear.

Everyone else thought it was a cilli-adea.

(Rating: 2.5/5)